Lesbian Tuesday Rework: “What It Feels Like for a [Lesbian]”

Usually, Lesbian Tuesdays are when I post about cool songs by musicians who are lesbians (or really popular in the gay community). I also post songs that are SOOOO obviously lesbian-related. For example, I might post about that girl crush song Rihanna released a while back.

However, in this post, I’m going to write about what it’s like to be a lesbian, or in this specific case: How I’m a moron because I like this one girl and act all stupid because of it, so here’s a post about what it does to your mind – in playlist form.

First, all I can do is wander around with sparkly eyes thinking “You are the girl that I’ve been dreaming of ever since I was a little girl” just like in “I’m Not Going to Teach Your Boyfriend How to Dance with You” by Black Kids. (This gets problematic though because of the competitive nature of the singer when he goes “ONE, I’m biting my tongue. TWO, I’m kissing on you. THREE, is he better than me?” because I totally get all weird and question my awesomeness when there is competition.)

Next, as Madonna says in “Hung Up,” “time goes by so slowly” and “every little thing you say or do, I’m hung up, I’m hung up on you…. I don’t know what to do.”

And then, I just feel really stupid and, as it goes in Passion Pit‘s “Cuddle Fuddle,” “Now I feel silly, selfish and dizzy but I got this feeling that you’ll forgive me. Oh my god, just please don’t ever let me go…. Put up with me and I’ll make you see that things are better when you’re with me.”

And thennnnn, there are times when I feel cocky as fuck. I feel like I’m the shit. I feel like I’m Chiddy in the Chiddy Bang’s remix of “Under the Sheets” by Ellie Goulding. I walk around thinking as the lyrics go, “And if you look at me I bet I have you starry eyed…”

Other times, my brain is all ADD and just all over the place, loud, neurotic. It feels exactly listening to the Beck remix of “The Girl” by Dr. Dog.

After those neurotic times, I feel pretty awesome about myself again. I feel like what a life based on Dinosaur Jr.’s “I Want You to Know” would be like. All country-rock inspired and tough and cowboy-boot-wearing and rough around the edges.

Then, I feel all lovey dovey and romantic and cutesy like “Strange Condition” by Pete Yorn. I especially feel stupid like his lines “You know you’re the best thing to ever come out of this place” and “It’s got me out of my head, and I don’t know what I came for” and especially “So leave out the others baby, and say I’m the only oneeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.”

But to be completely honest, I just always end up chainsmoking and moping around to Black Light Dinner Party’s “Gold Chain” on repeat.

And that’s what it’s like being a lesbian when you like someone.

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